Ezra My Good friend and Fellow Kenyan.. I’m referring in particular to the precise threshold that separates what we say from what we actually are, that separates what we are convinced of from what we actually do, wanting to be from being, indeed you are a tautological banality that can be very difficult to understand. You are what you have become and wanting to be something else just doesn’t fit.
What flabbergasts me is the conscience misdirection. It seems your mind is constantly confusing the act with the intentions by condemning the bad and forgetting to do justice to the good, not only out of respect for the inner truth, or out of compassion, but for an ideological propaganda that practical affects your judgement and fails to see what it can lead to. Honorable men know what to put right even if it had nothing to do with them.. They don’t desperately try justify the means.
There is, and, so long as the present conditions and the environment of denial prevails in which you want to live last, that portrays you as extremely sensitive but a man who lacks sufficient power of reflection, who in certain circumstances gets carried away by his passions and cannot openly recognize and exercise good conscience, see the distinction between error and malice. I ask myself, where is the moral influence in this man that will overcome this blind impulses. If, instead, you maintain a rigid schema that just pays tribute to your goodness, effort, commitment, courage and spirit of sacrifice.
It is sad when you only can reach your conscience through your hearts rather than and ensure that the valuable storehouses of energy that you embody be used for the cause in an intelligent, good and useful decision, in the interests of the country by just quitting.
As a fellow Kenyan Let your desires (and needs) of the present time be interpreter and not the cultural blanket that usually serves to provide an alibi that extinguishes enthusiasm. Let your involvement be consciously unselfish, meaningful, drawing into them the light of humanity and integrity that should be present in any positive development.
Words have their limit. It is not true that we manage to say everything that we think in words. Often, through words, we are capable of hiding what we are thinking in the most occult way… and fail to know when to quit.